2025: In Review

INTRO

A year is a long time. I say this even as the laws of perception run counter to it (age makes time feel faster). But seeing how much Silas has grown from ~1.5 to 2.5 years shows just how long 365 days can be, especially in retrospect. Last year, after he grew from .5 to 1.5 years I texted some friends who had kids about a year behind him that they were in for a great year of growth. That they had so much to look forward to. And I’d do the same this year if it wouldn’t seem repetitive. So I’ll save it for this post—looking back at his new skills, new words, new perceptions, he’s just grown so, so much. It’s all like having a new kid in some ways.

And in that there is so much joy. He’s becoming such a boy of wonder. Such a lover of his small and contained but evergrowing universe, such a dramatic spiller of emotions for the things that seem to go awry in that universe.

That’s the joy. But a year is a long time. This year was the hardest I’ve had since writing these reflections, probably the hardest I’ve ever had. And like most difficult years (a long time, right) It wasn’t the whole year. It was in the moments, the weeks & months. It was March and April. It was the echo of those months, the grief that followed.

In short, Silas had his second episode of seizures in late March. His first was in November last year (covered in last year’s review). This time was less scary since we knew what was happening and, at the same time, scarier because we saw that November wasn’t going to be an isolated episode. Later that week, we lost Maya’s mom. We had the funeral on a warm, rainy day in early April.

It’s hard to put myself back in those weeks. We barely made it out. Time eked slowly on. My mom came to help us (save us) with Silas and everything as we figured out our days and getting back & forth between NY and DC. We watched over Silas every minute of the day. We saw a half dozen doctors. We got new meds. We were told that the seizures are scary but not so serious. We were told he’ll grow out of them. We did and heard all of this in the middle of terrible grief. Slowly, and non-linearly we got through things and moved forward. We made changes for Silas and used the new meds. We talked about grief. We had bad days, worse days, good days, and days that passed without thinking much about anything at all. We both had good jobs that gave us time off and that welcomed us back and never put too much strain on our lives. Very lucky to have that.

And still, then, we traveled and found joy through the year. We went to Chicago in the summer and I got to bring Silas and Maya to Wrigley Field. Abundant joys, the most terrific of nostalgia. We went to a few different beaches in the summer, including a nice long weekend in Rehoboth. In New York, we grew our local family as my sister Lindsey moved to Brooklyn in September. With Maya’s sister a few blocks away and my sister across the borough, it really feels like our roots are settling in. Our community & family is close and growing.

Through the year, everything else fell into its own place: Silas got stronger. He hasn’t had any seizures since. We took him out of daycare and started with a nanny. A bad one and then a great one. I started going to my office everyday. My job continues to be rewarding. Maya’s too. My company went public in July. I drank champagne at 8:30 in the morning. We went to Chicago in the fall. We didn’t go to California in the fall/winter because Silas came down with something, even though we were so ready to see some friends. We ended our year in Puerto Rico (again) and now we’re rolling into 2026, ready to leave 2025 behind for the most part but still holding on to some of the better memories and isn’t that always the wish right? And the truth is that you never get to pick what stays left behind and what comes with you as you face the repetition of days—yes, yes, like boats against the current but with something different. The boat or the waves—one or both— laden with the joy & the grief & the other years before it.

2025 CATEGORIES

Travel – Nothing major but some wonderful trips around the states (in no particular order). Mentioned most of the trips above and got a few SF work trips where I got to see some friends.

Writing – got back into Writing this year, a bit. Made some Notion ‘entries’ like short essays, mostly about historical oddities and started workshopping a short story in my mind, or maybe something like a recurring blog for the future. All about history which has the benefit of never going out of date.

Reading – 24 books read this year—slightly down from 27 last year and well in the mid 30s years prior. That’s OK. I read two giant books (The Stand, Cryptonomicon) which each could be 3-4 books. It felt good to read BIG, long stories. I’ll talk more about reading in the favorites section! Full list of books I read can be found here.

Professionally – It was a good year at work, another full year at Figma (my second) and this year had the IPO in late July which the company had a huge party for. It also means I got to cash out some stock benefits so a good move for the bank accounts. Not much has changed since (a good thing!). I still like my job & my team and have the openness to run experiments and talk about innovative ways to approach how we learn. I got to record a few podcasts and talks this year too which is always fun. I’m very lucky to like my line of work and to feel challenged to continue to push its boundaries and to have the larger looming question around what Learning means year after year.

2025 FAVORITES

Favorite New Thing

Reading (fiction) on my (subway) commute

Last year, my favorite thing was Silas’s new ages (7-19 months). This year it would be that same thing, in continuation. So in the spirit of not always picking that—though assuredly seeing him grow from 19-31 months is my favorite new thing, I’ll pick the not-so-new favorite thing of reading on the subway, which feels new enough.

The reason this is new is I’ve only had one job I fully commuted for regularly and that was for maybe 6 months between late 2019 and early 2020 and I had so much extra time then it didn’t feel like such a sacred reading window. Now, with a kiddo and family, and since our nanny is with Silas during the day at home and I’m commuting back to my office most days, this is really my time. I’ve filled it with reading and think my book list would be half as long without this time this year. I’ve also found that it’s best to fill this with fiction!

Other favorites: good kids movies that are tolerable to watch (Despicable Me & Sing > Paw Patrol), using AI tools creatively like making this Spiderman game for Silas, eggs & coffee at the local diner with Maya & Silas while the little guy crushes pancakes, the Good Ones podcast’s Laughening Round, especially the ask about the Mount Rushmores of Mount Rushmores (4 sections of 4 favorites – example), Dad book clubs

Favorite Book Read in 2025

The New York Trilogy (Paul Auster)

The big books this year (The Stand, Cryptonomicon) could easily stand in here. I loved being immersed in those worlds (for so long), but this was my first time reading Auster, riding the train to and from work and finding myself transfixed in his odd, payphone era New York. The trilogy is, of course, three books in one that sort of exist in the same universe and call back characters (though seldomly). They’re all mysteries of the existential kind. You can’t be sure what’s totally real and what time has passed and locations are visited. It throws you for a loop while maintaining its momentum and its steam and I just think it’s clearly worth the fuss and the achievement of literature. A three-of-a-kind book that

You can see all of my 2025 books read here.

Other favorites:The Stand (Stephen King), Cryptonomicon(Neal Stephenson), Beyond Measure: The Hidden History of Measurement(James Vincent)

Favorite 2025 Movie

One Battle After Another

High expectations were met here. PTA put together a loose Pynchon interpretation with a killer cast and a big budget—that’s a great start to any equation. Throw in Leo as the star playing a real Pynchon loser-type (though with a mission!) and you got yourself a good flick. Throw in a nearly hour long chase scene and it turns great.

I loved this movie and I think a lot of others did too—managed to be fun, suspenseful, and silly all at once (a PTA flavor) while introducing one of the best villains of the decade in Sean Penn. Should sweep up some serious Oscars and remain on ‘best of’ lists for years to come.

Other favorites: Friendship

Favorite 2025 TV Show

Tie: The Studio, The Rehearsal Season 2, Episode 3

Looking back, I’m almost certain The Studio will stand as the year’s favorite and was by far my most recommended (to anyone who loves movies). The Rehearsal gets on the favorite list simply for episode #3 which might be the best episode of television I’ve ever seen—where Nathan Fielder becomes Captain Sully Sullenberger, almost for no real reason at all. The high-meta, high-method acting is exactly what I want out of my television shows, especially when the stakes are so low. And Nathan Fielder delivers the kind of deadpan comedy that just really hits my funnybone.

The Studio, on the other hand, was just big missile comedy at its finest. Over the top antics and running jokes, a stellar comedic ensemble. Full one-shot episodes, you name it. It was an ode to new hollywood with an homage to old hollywood and the art of making movies.

Other favorites: The Beast in Me, The Chair Company

Favorite 2025 Article

‘The Delirious, Violent, Impossible True Story of the Zizians’ (Wired, Evan Ratliff) — archive link for non-subscribers here

Getting any Evan Ratliff longform is a gift (strongly recommend his podcast Persona and regularly recommend his AI podcast (before its time!)—and this story is a real deep dive. (Like real deep—It’s listed as a 90 minute listen on the Wired site!). It starts like this:

“I know this is unconventional, but I’m going to start by telling you the ending. Or at least, the ending as it stands today. Most of the people involved in this story wind up either dead, maimed, spending months in a mental hospital.”

And it’s true! And it’s not the kind of dead or maimed that you might read in a mob book, this is seemingly nonviolent people (at least a first? maybe?) that get wrapped up in a cause or really a cult around a personality and a set of unchangeables ideas—namely wrapped in rationalism and the effective altruism movement. But to such a degree that they can deem killing a rational and positive outcome (much like SBF could do so with gambling). I won’t go into more but if you want a starting place you can read the Wikipedia page on the Zizians and see if you wanna dive in more. Ratliff’s article takes you through all the twists and turns—someday it should be a movie.

Other favorites: Taste in Math (Colosus), The New World( Colosus), The Blue Book Burglar (Atavist), American Hindenburg (Atavist)

Favorite 2025 Album

Snocaps – Snocaps

Like getting another Waxahatchee album with the guests you’d want to see the most (Lenderman) and a relaxed production that probably only comes with a random mix of talent coming together for a temporary project (see Boygenius). Snocaps’ first (only?) album is really just great from front to back. Highlights for me are ‘Heathcliff’ and ‘I Don’t Want To’.

I’ve found it transcends moods where other albums are really only best when feeling some other sensation, this one seems to roll well with whatever’s going on. A fun one. I hope they do another!

Other favorites: Getting Killed (Geese), Always Been (Craig Finn)

Favorite 2025 Song

Geese – ‘Taxes’

I have a playlist on my Spotify called ‘All-Timers’ which is a sort of working collection of my favorite songs—songs I’m quite sure I’ll always want to be listening too (which has held up so far). This song is maybe the fastest addition to that playlist I’ve ever made—perhaps the only addition that was added the same year it came out. Usually these things need to exist for some time to accumulate both enough listen and enough confidence that future listens will be needed.

Not ‘Taxes’. It’s an instant classic for me—and clearly for some others as Geese has blown up—and yet I can tell already that most of y’all will hate this one. That’s OK. Acquired taste, etc. etc. You know the band knew they were on to something—with its jangle, and its uplifting, affirming music that picks up as you go, mixed with dour lyrics about the banal—as it was the first single of its monster indie record from thai year.

Other favorites: Geese – ‘Au Pays du Cocaine’, Snocaps – ‘Heathcliff’, Craig Finn – ‘People of Substance’, Craig Finn – ‘Crumbs’,

Gotta shout-out this stanza from ‘Crumbs’

Now all those choices seem a little grim

Violent wild or disengaged and dim

The highway goes forever

But your funds will fence you in

Paying bills and stubbing out generic super slims

The years they put the yellow in her hair and teeth and skin

Favorite 2025 Podcast Episode

‘Can Reading Fix Men?’ Shilo Brooks on Honestly with Bari Weiss

I think it’s a more eccentric title than it needs to be (but what isn’t these days?). Most of the episode isn’t really specific to men (or boys), though that does come up, but Brooks’s message is one I’m in total alignment with: confronting great works of literature builds character. You are forced to reckon with good people behaving badly, vice versa, and the world doing terrible things to undeserving people (and again, vice versa). It is these confrontations—often not something you reckon with on a daily basis—that build you up so you can reckon when they come up. We are losing that.

In Brooks’s own words, his work in teaching reading and great literature is “a way of making sure your spirit survives the pressures that are put on it.”

I think reading is a tremendous net positive for individuals and groups. I even started a book club with two other dad friends this year. But it’s a hard sell. It’s hard work when the rest of your life is fed to you in increasingly efficient ways. For great works, you have to earn the pay-off. You have to give it a lot of attention. To truly see the way a sentence can inflict something great upon your spirit, you need to be alone and quiet with that sentence. That seems so, so hard today.

Other favorites: ‘Epic’ (Acquired), Fresh Air interview on Tonight in Jungleland (making of Born To Run), A Perfect Average Anomaly (Search Engine), The RFK Jr. Problem (Revisionist History)